In a stunning development, Speakeasy Sports has learned that Patriots’ recent draft pick Isaiah Wynn was not the player that the team intended to select with the 23rd overall selection in the 2018 NFL Draft.
According to sources, Head Coach Bill Belichick was enjoying a large glass of Jets Owner Woody Johnson’s tears while repeatedly mumbling to himself, “yes, yes, I win, I win.” Other members of the Patriots’ war-room believed Belichick’s “I win” comment was in reference to Isaiah Wynn, who is listed as “I. Wynn” on the official draft card.
Fortunately for the Patriots, the player who sources reveal they originally intended to take with the 23rd pick — 5’8” white-dude slot-receiver Braxton Berrios — fell to them later in the draft. “You can never have enough short, white-dude slot receivers,” Belichick said. “They are the most valuable asset in the NFL. If the league would let me, I would field a roster of exclusively of albino oompa-loompas. You can’t teach that low center of gravity.”
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